Wednesday, December 9, 2009

I don't want a Slushy anymore

It is now official. It’s Winter.

How did I figure this out? The exact time when Fall turned into Winter? The biggest indicator: assholes on the road who, after a year, have forgotten how to drive in snow.

My part of Ontario was blanketed under what weather specialists call a 10-cm snowfall, starting late last night and going on into this morning’s rush hour. It’s still falling, and now it’s mixed with rain. I know Mary @ Holy Mackerel is sequestered in her home as her husband tries to get another flight out to Florida after theirs was cancelled. I feel your pain, Mary. In a Battle Royale with Florida vs. snow, I choose Florida every damn time.

I hope my drive home is not as eventful as my drive into work this morning. Not only were there crazies on the road (you know those people who thinks a little snow means to go faster than the speed limit and then brake suddenly and fishtail when they realize the traffic up ahead is not of the same mindset), but there’s also the aftermath to deal with – the slush and the sheets of ice floating off the roofs of the cars whose owners forgot or were too lazy to clear them off. For me, this morning was all about the slush and how it got inside my car.

Yes, I said inside my car. Here’s the low-down:
You know those scenes in the movies where a character gets creamed with a pie meant for someone else or a fully iced beverage? Replace the pie or drink with a vast amount of slush and the perpetrator with a semi that should not have been driving on a secondary road and you will have my roadway adventure.

It all started when a hunk of snow slid from my driver’s side mirror and splattered against my side window. And because it was packing snow, it stuck. Now I’m one for complete visibility, especially during the first snow of the season and with all those crazies out there, so I rolled down my window to remove the snow. It should have been a simple exercise. But that’s where the semi came in. And the vat of slush that came into the car and up one side of my head when the semi passed at breakneck speed.

I looked like Two-Face out of the Batman adventures. One side of my body was dry, but one was doused in a mix of snow, salt and rain, oh, and that black shit that comes off of tires. I’m just surprised I had the wherewithal to a) roll up the window, and b) know when to stop since my one eye was slushed. I felt like a Slushy Machine had exploded at the 7-11 and I was the lucky person to be pouring a drink at the time.

I don’t think this has ever happened to me before – the timing, the road conditions and winter onslaught – it was I had entered the catastrophe lottery and won. My number was up.


On an aside, the powers that be heard my prayers from the other day and despite being called in the third round of jury selection, I was spared from sitting through a full criminal court case. Just as the third group was about to enter the court to be sworn in and accepted or challenged as potential jury, we were told that the 12th final jury member had been accepted. Phew!

It did mean a day of sitting in a stale room full of other potential jurors, but the good news is it was only a day and in some way I served my civic duty.


  1. Would love to be able to say I can identify with you but... NO SNOW here possum! I say a move is in order ;-)

  2. Oh hell yeah, Ange. I was following Lulu's adventures in France and fell in love. I need to make my way across the pond!

  3. I would have loved to have seen a pic of Two-Face. We need to catch up soon.