Monday, December 7, 2009

All I want for Christmas


I have a hard time writing Christmas lists, especially when it comes to me asking for things. I don’t want to appear greedy, so I write nothing. I do have everything that I “need” and those wants are left for me to yearn after. Do I want a digital SLR? Hell yeah, but asking for it moves into expecting it and that transfers into greediness. So instead I look to add little, inexpensive things like slippers and gift certificates to Tim Horton’s – nothing that breaks the bank as I’m sure the SLR would.

But, in the blogosphere, I can let my true list hang out and mingle with all you bloggers. So here it is, Scribe’s wish list. Some are serious, some are not. Take it with a grain of salt, or if you are so inclined, run out and grab it for me. I would surely appreciate it.

1. Nikon D90 12.3MP Digital SLR Camera with 18-105mm VR Lens Kit – and all the accessories, including memory card – of course this has to be number one since I opened up this blog entry with it. Besides, I really want it. I mean. Really.

2. It would be an early Christmas present, but I have to ask now because it’s coming up tomorrow… please, please, please let me be excused from jury duty. I have to report to the courthouse tomorrow at 9 a.m., and because I don’t get paid for jury duty, save the scraps the Attorney-General will throw my way, I can’t afford to be off work for any length of time. They’ll dock me. They really will. They already said. Bastards.

3. A gift certificate to Weight Watchers and the gumption to go. I could ask for Santa to grant me the perfect body and the ability to eat everything I want, but I think I would just go ape-shit with that and besides, it’s not realistic and these days I’m all about realism.

4. A new job that falls into my lap, with no effort or no search on my part. Fantasy? Yes, but I don’t care. I’m not THAT into realism.

5. Slippers – yes, I actually do want them – and ones that the dog will not chew, attack or lick.

6. While I’m at it, I would like Kao to stop eating my underwear. Yes, I’ve lost another pair. I swear that dog has thumbs. And an iron gut.

7. Gift certificates to Winners, Reitman’s or any such clothing store. You don’t have to pick out the clothing yourself… I’ll be even more impressed with the certificate. Do you hear me, Mother? Absolutely no purple sweatshirts with big, honking sunflowers, or I’ll re-gift it back to you AGAIN. Learn your lessons, woman!

8. A birthday or Christmas that does not begin or end in tears, usually mine, over a snide comment from the parental units. Your job is done. Get out.

9. World peace. Yeah, I know. Everyone asks for it and most are joking about it because that’s what all the beauty queens say they want the most for this world. I want everyone to learn how to get along, accept their differences and learn from them. There’s room here for everyone.

10. People to say what they mean and mean what they say. Be honest and follow through with your promises. It may seem this is meant for our politicians, but I think we could all use that lesson.

Happy Shopping! Happy Holidays! Happy Monday, bloggers.

5 comments:

  1. Amen to #10!! I wish that every day!!

    I truly wish for #1 for you - it was last year's for us (from the whole family and friends and to each other, ONE present!! But a beauty!!)

    Every girl needs a good pair of slippers. i was wondering who Kao was for a minute, and why you wanted it to stop ;-) Then I read further!
    Well that's it for the insinuations from my neck of the woods. Hope a little misplaced Aussie humour doesn't bother you!

    Merry Christmas Scribe. Hope Santa fills your new undies with all your hear desires and that he retains the sunflowered sweater for your boss!!

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  2. Ange, I love me a little misplaced Aussie humour!

    Merry Christmas to you too, Ange! I would send a little authentic Canadian snow your way, but would you believe we haven't had any yet? Instead, I send you a wish for world peace, enlightenment and continued awe of your inspirational blog. Oh, and the sunflowered sweater will be burned.

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  3. And we too are having unreasonably warm weather! NO ICE yet... Bugger - should we be wishing for global warming to stop ;-) I've put you well and truly in my sidebar so I get to you each time you put up a new post now!! Thanks for the nice words about my Blog
    Moi

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  4. I have a hideous list too.
    Bagpipes.
    Laser eye surgery.
    A new car.
    A Kindle.

    Yeah, so I ain't gettin non of that shit. So I asked for paint instead. That's right paint. My mom gave me cash for my bday, and that translates into paint. =D

    Hopefully if you tell the court that you can't afford to take off work because they said they will dock you, then you might be dismissed. If it's a hardship, they are supposed to let you go.

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  5. Hey Aunt,

    Good news. They don't like me at the courthouse. It could be that I was reading "My Friend Leonard" while waiting to be chosen for a drug-related criminal case...

    If I had the funds, I'd totally buy you a set of bagpipes and then demand that you play them ALL day for me. You don't know how much of a freak I am about the sound! I used to listen to Pipes on Parade with my aunt every flippin' weekend - my request!

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