Circus clowns and other assholes

A half dozen circus clowns came into my town and they've set up residence in my home - my womb, that is. And they have just evacuated the Volkswagen Beetle and have set up to start the juggling any minute now.

Yes, the circus is in town and that means five days of no fucky fucky, bleedy bleedy and a rather horrendous bout of hormonal tears. That was today and my inner suck came out and I cried at everything, even Kim Cattrall as she searched for her dead-beat, polygamist grandfather. I guess it struck a chord. My grandfather may not have been a polygamist (as far as I know), but he was as dead-beat as they come.

I also realized today that even two weeks after being released from my job at Cell Block C just talking about the still existent drama still gets my stress level rising. The more things change, the more they stay the same. Even though I'm not there any longer it's status quo at the prison, with the prison guards and the garrison manager having screaming matches in front of their employees.

I miss working with some of the people in Cell Block C. What I don't miss is the stress inducers such as above. Today was one of my down days. I was told I was bound to have them though I've been trying to keep the glass half full. What I realized is how much worse it would be if I was still subjected to a toxic environment in which everyone is yelling and no one is happy. It was bound to have affected my health even further if I had stayed. Praise Darwin for small mercies. Now to get rid of the clowns...

The clowns are juggling!

My friend Anasatan describes her monthly "gift" as a traveling circus that has set up inside her uterus. Then we both look at each other, pretend to juggle ('cause I suck at it and there would be casualties if I actually juggled for reals) and hum the circus song. You know, the clown song where they all get out of an incredibly small Volkswagon Bug, juggling of course.

I am sad to say that the circus has pulled in and the main tent is now being erected (and nothing else) less than two days before I have to spend six to seven hours on a plane with the smallest bathrooms on the planet. I also have to make room for tampons, sanitary napkins and feminine wipes in my carry-on, my purse AND my suitcase. As if I didn't have anything else to pack!

Now I know what you're thining... "didn't you time this? Wouldn't you know EXACTLY when your period would come and prepare accordingly?" Yes and no. I had hoped it would come last week when it was expected, but I've never been a by-the-book type of girl. Even my reproductive system is a procrastinator.

I just hope the clowns don't get too out of hand. They're wily like that. Those damn ass clowns!