She's so Leeenda!

Talking about the DR and my vacation there (and my return visit six months later 'cause that's how awesome it is!), reminded me of one part that drove me nuts.

You all probably know how "Linda" means beautiful in Spanish. Yes, it does, and I was reminded every fecking day that I was there. The men in the DR are very forthcoming. Even stepping off the plane and herding to the bus to take us to our home away from home for a week, we were bombarded with cat calls, whistles and offers of help to carry our luggage (Step away from the bags, boys, and I'm not meaning my suitcase!).

"Oh Mamacita, you so linda. You want a Dominican boyfriend? I want to marry you."

Yes, we weren't there for more than 20 minutes and we were getting marriage proposals. It was a little overwhelming, flattering but overwhelming. And, when you consider that 20 minutes does not a relationship make, you then feel a little ridiculous for even being flattered for that second.

Sure, I'm beautiful. I am Linda, am I not? But, coming from a country where single women in their 30s are still looked on as "spinsters," you tend to be a little cautious, okay maybe jaded when you hear how beautiful, how linda you are after stepping off of a cramped airplane.

(My brother was referred to me as his "spinster sister with the whole house of cats --- I had two. He got a swift kick up the A-to-the-butthole.)

And, so it happened. Every time someone asked me my name (and it happened in the resort, in the stores, in the street - they wanted to get to know you because Canadian girls are apparently the bomb in the DR), I heard "Oh Leeenda (insert Spanish accent here), do you know what Leeenda means in Spanish?" Yes, yes, sir I do and no, I don't want to marry you. I will not bear your children. I will not see your one-eyed trouser snake. And no, I don't want to be your Canadian girlfriend, flattering or not, since you're 15 years my junior.

I have nothing against May-December romances. I think everyone deserves love, at any age. But when the I love you comes after 15 minutes of talking, or even an afternoon on a catamaran with a ton of Santo Libres, then I think you have lots of thinking to do.

I looked up my name on Urban Dictionary, as was the trend a few weeks ago. This is what I found (and yes, beautiful was in there):

Linda: meaning beautiful or cute in spanish..would usually fun,caring and effin awesome in bed! is described mostly to be crazy and not care what others think if her.

I preferred this one:
spanish name meaning cute.

a common name used in the fifties.
meaning caring, helpful, energetic, organized,spiritual,compassionate, thoughtful and hard working.

Nowhere in there did I see Linda: a girl who gets marriage proposals only 15 minutes after stepping off of a plane. Maybe I should suggest it.